New car!

After months of research, followed by 2 solid months of Dave haggling every dealership around to whittle of every dollar possible, we finally got our new family car.

It was really hard to give up my Xterra. As we drove away, even now as I see it in the dealership lot when I pass by....it still feels like MINE. I loved that car completely and never wanted for anything more. It was the first car I went out and got on my own, and worked my butt off to pay for. It took us on all kinds of trips to IL and NC to see family. It was my car in college. It was my car as I was single. It was my car as I was engaged. It was my car as I was married. We brought Ryan home in that car...I still remember the incredibly inappropriate song that was playing on the radio when we pulled away from the hospital. I remember driving that car around with a 6 week old Grimm in my lap, with his head hanging out the window. It never ever failed me. I had it for 8 years.

With our growing family, we just needed more room. We take our dogs with us a lot of places, and 2 adults, 2 dogs, a stroller and a carseat would just barely fit in the Xterra if we maneuvered everything just right. There is no way another carseat would fit. And any time we had company, we always had to take 2 cars because 2 people would not fit in the back with the carseat. I know that in reality, we could have made it work just fine...plenty if people get by with much less. But with 2 kids under 2 years old, a certain level of comfort and convenience comes into play. And we have been scrimping and saving to put away a large down payment for the past year because we saw this coming. So, as much as we are against having debts, we were able to pay for about half of the car and finance the other half, which we hope to pay on for no more than 2 years.

It is a really nice car and fits our family's individual needs as perfectly as any car out there possibly can. We had the car custom built for us to make sure it was exactly what we wanted, since this is going to be our family car until...well, until it doesn't run anymore probably!

We named it "The Ni-Night Rider" since it is black on black and will see many a nap ;)

We wanted All Wheel Drive, since we hope to move somewhere with actual seasons someday, and the AWD will come in handy in the winter.

Dave really was sold on the captains chairs in the middle row - 2 buckets seats rather than a full across bench seat - they will be good for the kids to have their own space, and it makes moving around in the back a LOT easier.

I was set on having 2 sunroofs - a regular one in the front seat and a moonroof that doesn't actually open in the back seat - because I would have DIED to have my sunroof to look out of when I was a kid, so I wanted that for my kids.

The back hatch opens with the push of a button - something we thought was really unnecessary at first, but after grocery shopping with a squirming toddler...it is nice...really really nice to have.

There is a 3rd row seat, so that when we have visitors we can all ride together. And there is still enough room for a stroller in the cargo area when the 3rd row is in use. Or the seat can fold down completely so that the dogs can ride with us with no hassles.

The 2nd row of seats move in a lot of different positions to accommodate a range of situations that may arise.

I can use my phone through the speakers, and there is even a USB port so we can just keep the iPod plugged in at all times and play it through the radio.

It has heated seats...oh how I love heated seats.

We went with black leather interior, even though I don't favor leather, we thought it would be easiest with kids and dogs. Messes will wipe off a lot easier.

And we got this special exterior black paint color that has a little bit of shimmer or sparkle to it up close.

It has a tow package already installed for our future boat and/or jet skis ;) haha

I'm sure there is more...but those are the main things.

I am still getting accustomed to it. It rides a lot differently than my old car - its like your floating on glass rather than bouncing around in a doom-buggy! Hahaha! And its a lot bigger and wider than my Xterra. In the Xterra, I could reach everything a lot easier since it was a smaller car all around. And my old car was pretty manual - the radio buttons, the AC knobs - this car it's all different and just takes a while to get used to.

But we are enjoying our new car, even though I will always miss my old car, we are very thankful that we were able to provide our growing family with something that suits much better.

Gardening with Daddy

Dave planted a garden again this year, and Ryan loves to help daddy outside when he comes home from work. It is the cutest, most heart warming thing ever to watch her follow right along behind him with her little bucket of water. She helps water the plants and scoops dirt with her little shovel. I've never really allowed her to get dirty before this...she was either too young or it was dark by the time daddy got home or the weather was too cold for her to be parading around the yard. But now she is big enough and listens well enough to not try to put every single thing in her mouth. It's hard to believe that there was once a time when she was afraid of the grass! Now, most days she has to be stripped down at the back door because she is soaking wet, covered in grass clippings, or dripping with mud. It is strangely endearing to see her in such disarray...I can only imagine how much fun this must be for her and I am reminded of how much I loved trudging through creeks and climbing trees when I was a kid. I am watching the wonder of childhood unfold right before my eyes, and I feel so blessed that we get to be a part of that.

Yep, them un-yuns is lookin good!

We may need more water, daddy

Farmer Sullivan

He is teaching her what the different plants are, and she will stand next to him pointing and saying "may-toe, un-yun, beanzz, cum-ba"...pretty cute, and pretty smart! When Dave finds a worm, he shows her and they put it in the dirt together - she is not afraid to touch them! And one night when they came in for dinner Dave asked her to tell me what she found and she said "PO-LEEEE!!" meaning roly poly.

Scoop!

Daddy showing me how to rake the dirt

my very own watering can

watering the strawberries for daddy

Ryan enjoyed splashing in the garden's water buckets so much that we decided that she needed a water table. These things are GREAT...it's just a table that holds water that they can stand at and splash, pour, dump, and play with the water and any water toys we throw in there. Dave found one for only $20 in a Big Lots mailer, so we headed up there one night after he got off of work to snag one. He assembled it and filled it up with water on the back porch. He sat out there watching Ryan play as I cooked dinner and when they came in to eat, he said that she had not made ONE PEEP the entire time! She loves it!!

how many pictures do we need, mom??

teeny weeny bikini!

oops! missed my bucket!

I could do this all day!

Illinois! Spring 2012

I wanted to get up to visit my family in Illinois before the baby is born and needed to do it before I got too big to travel. Dave had to go out of town for work for several days to D.C. and it just happened to be right around the time I was thinking of heading north. I don't like to be here alone, so we decided to drive up as a family, then Dave could fly in and out of St. Louis.

Our trip up was phenomenal. Ryan was OVERLY cooperative! She woke up around 5:30, which is unusually early for her, but we decided to go ahead and get up and moving. We had breakfast, finished packing, got ourselves ready, loaded the car, and it was 7:30 by the time we were out the door.

We only made one real stop the whole trip! I packed us a picnic lunch and we stopped at a truck stop to eat it and let Ryan and I walk around for a bit, then we were off again.

Somewhere in Kentucky Ryan dozed off for her afternoon nap and we pulled over to switch drivers so Dave could catch a nap too. When we stopped, I ran in a gas station to use the restroom, and that is the only stops we ever made...with a toddler and a water loving pregnant lady!! Seems unfathomable!!

We stayed with my grandparents in my hometown. Lots of family came over on Saturday to visit with us and my grandma made a big dinner for everyone.

Sunday morning, we went to church where I grew up before Ryan and I had to drive Dave to St. Louis to fly to D.C. Our friend, Damian, and his wife, Mary, live in D.C., so they picked him up from the airport and they all went out to dinner together.

Ryan and I had a great time with my grandparents while Dave was away. We didn't really do much of anything, but it's those small things that make for special days. We went on walks and enjoyed the beautiful weather. We watched countless choo-choo trains beyond the backyard. Grandma Judy taught Ryan all about birds and how they eat worms. Papa sat on the porch with Ryan and read books to her. He even taught her a new high-five....the "fist bump"! My great-uncle, Jim, is totally smitten with Ryan, and always comes to see us when we are up. He gave Ryan a couple of sweet toys, but her eyes lit up when he handed her a single dollar bill (she loves when she gets to put money in her piggy bank). My Aunt Sheila brought her some wonderful toys and read her lots of books too!

Hi Papa!!

Ryan smelled the daffodils in the front yard daily, and she picked a flower for her mommy for the very first time...my heart melted!! We pointed out endless cows, horses, chickens, dogs, birds, trucks, trains, trees and planes. We played on the school playground that I grew up on. We ran and played in the streets! (not many cars go by, so it's safe!) Ryan came home with bruised up and skinned up knees and I adore it. I don't say that to be mean, but that's it's a symbol of a kid having fun in the country...when is the last time you had a skinned up knee from having too much fun?

SMELL!

Bird!

Grandma Judy pushing me on the swings

It was wonderful having the extra sets if eyes and hands to help me with Ryan in Dave's absence, but the best part of the whole trip was watching my daughter interact with my grandparents, her great-grandparents, much in the same ways as I did as a child. She put Papa's cowboy boots on and it was like I was watching MYSELF as a child....because we ALL did that. I got pictures of her in Papa's boat...which I have a few pictures of myself sitting in his boat at that age. Ryan was completely enamored by her great-grandparents, as well as my aunt, uncle, and cousins. And I'm pretty sure the feeling is mutual!

My "CUTE" face and wearing Papa's boots :)

In Papa's boat...this looks just like mommy as a baby!

My grandparents offered to keep Ryan Wednesday night as I went to go pick up Dave at the St. Louis airport. Luckily, it was late enough that all they really had to worry about was playing with her for about 30 minutes, then getting her to off to bed. They said she was no problem at all and went right to sleep...I always worry that she will be difficult for others and I just hate the thought of that!

the Easter Bunny came to visit Ryan in Illinois!

When I picked up Dave, we decided that we needed to cut our trip short a day and leave the very next morning so that Dave could get some work done Friday from home.

The trip home was not so good. Having to leave always makes me emotional, and leaving an entire day early magnifies it by 1000...oh, and did I mention that I am pregnant? We didn't pack anything the night before since Ryan was asleep in our room when we got back from the airport. So we didn't end up getting packed and on the road until about 10:30. Ryan fell asleep before we were even out of the state and had a pitiful 45 minute nap...the ONLY sleep she would get on the trip. Then it was time to stop for lunch, which takes about 2 hours. We got back on the road and ran into a completely miserable hail storm on top of a mountain...there was instantly about 3 inches of hail on the road out of nowhere! It was the loudest thing ever and I could just imagine the holes it was putting in the car....luckily, it wasn't our car! Hahaha! (the dealership we bought our new car from gave us a loaner to take on the trip until our new car was delivered). Ryan was not a fun passenger for most of the trip south...she was fussy, demanding, and nothing would suit her. I flopped my pregnant belly back and forth between front and back seats trying to appease her. We finally made it to the Georgia line and we stopped at the welcome center to feed Ryan a pathetic dinner of cold pizza, cheese crackers, and blueberries....all that I had left in the cooler. She was SO tired of the car, so we walked around with her for about an hour. She was in a terrible mood, and only daddy would do, so I took over driving so he could sit in the back with her. About 20 minutes down the road, the sky turned black and started to pour. I hate driving in the rain, plus I was in the middle of nowhere in a new car...we needed gas anyway, so I pulled over to make Dave drive again. We get maybe 3 exits down the interstate and Ryan reeks of poop. So we pull over AGAIN to change her at a truck stop. The changing table in the women's room was in use by a particularly fussy babe, so daddy took her to the mens room. He comes out looking quite flustered....there was no poop. False alarm. So back in the car, next exit down the road...I can't find my phone anywhere. I was sure I had not taken it into the truck stop with me, but I am so absent minded that Dave pulls over AGAIN to double check. I finally found it and we were off again. We were about 45 minutes from home and when Ryan REALLY pooped. We had to stop in the ghetto to change her, and no one had a changing table. So to improvise, we pulled out her stroller, layed down the seat, and changed her in the parking lot...I'm fairly certain Dave had his hand on his gun during this little episode. We made it home around 10:30....feeling like we had just been beaten to death. Dave and I were so over it, we never even ate dinner. We went straight to bed, too exhausted to unpack anything at all, be thankful that we made it home, or even laugh together at all of the CRAP we had just endured...

Little man update

We finally decided on a name for our little man! Dave had the final say this time around. We had a name picked out for a while, but we're a little unsure and weren't ready to fully commit. But when we had our ultrasound to determine gender, after they told us he was a boy, I kept thinking as I was looking at the screen "that's Jacob." Kind of the same thing that happened with Ryan. So after about a week of thinking about it, we went ahead and made it official...his name is Jacob Conner Sullivan. We both just like the name Jacob, as well as Jake, and Conner is in honor of my grandpa - it's his last name and his only son has only girls, so there won't be anymore Conners. Also, we apparently like to subconsciously name our kids the most Irish names we can think of ;)

The last boy born into my immediate blood family (the branches below my grandpa) was my older brother...33 years ago, so having a new little guy around is going to be quite a change!

Jacob is moving around a good bit these days. He feels much different than Ryan did. Ryan never changed positions. She laid in the same spot for 9 whole months just kicking the mess out of my ribs. But this little guy is a roller! He does kick, but he mostly kind of tumbles around. He pushes out a lot too. Sometimes it feels like he just decided to stand straight up!

I have been feeling good for the most part. Well, physically anyhow. Mentally I am in a stage where I feel very foggy...I am easily emotional, and it doesn't take much to hurt my feelings or make me get really down. And when I get down, it takes a LONG time to feel better. I feel pretty paranoid too...like everyone is looking at me, judging me, or talking about me. Very weird. Oh, and I feel very dumb too - baby brain has hit in full force. I can't think of words in general conversations! And when trying to explain something, I can't form the sentences I want and I go around in circles. It's like being a crazy person! Luckily, Dave is very understanding and helpful. When I feel like the whole world is against me, he can talk me through it and make me feel loved.

Recently I have been having a LOT of pain when walking...as in I can just barely walk. The pain is just under my belly, like where my leg bones click into my hips...I'm dancing around the words 'crotch' and 'groin' here...I talked to several friends about it who have been pregnant twice and they said they had it the 2nd time around too. My friend, Susie, said she even got so scared that she called her doctor about it and they said it was normal and to use a heating pad and stay off your feet. Well, I do those 2 things and it DOES help. It helps a LOT actually...but...I am NOT the kind to walk to stay off of my feet! I want to NEST! I want to cook meals to freeze, or scrub the shower, or vacuum the whole house, or take Ryan to the park to play, or push her around the neighborhood in her stroller on long walks for the fresh air and exercise! One day during her nap time, I decided to spend my free time lying on the couch, no TV, just laying there. I hated it. And I hated that I hated it, but I nevertheless...it was not what I wanted to be doing.

Dave is extremely helpful when he gets home from work. Most days he takes Ryan outside to play so I can finish making dinner, then after we eat, he plays with her some more and helps me clean up the kitchen. Then I lay on the couch with my feet up for a few minutes before getting in the shower with Ryan. And after our shower, it is pretty much couch time for me until bedtime. I want to be up helping him get Ryan off to bed, but by the end of the day, my body just kind of gives out on me sometimes. It is actually not THAT bad, but we don't want it to get THAT bad, so we are trying to have me take it easy as much as possible. I definitely do not feel as strong as I did with Ryan...I have NO time to work out this time around, and the first time I was working our at least 4 days a week, not including walking almost every night.

All of my doctor's appointments have been going well. Jacob is measuring right on schedule and doing all of the little baby things he should be doing. Heart rate is good, my blood pressure is good - even lower than it was with Ryan usually! I had my gestational diabetes test and passed with flying colors...and I did NOT pass out this time!! The girl who draws my blood now is VERY good and I barely feel a thing.

Once Dave can get Jake's ultrasound pictures scanned, I will post them. But until then, here are a few belly photo of us :)

21 weeks

23 weeks

27 weeks

Our sleep troubles

Ryan has always had a problem with going to sleep. Sure, she can pass out no problem in the car or in her stroller, which is usually how I try to plan her naps each day, but at night...well, sigh. She has ALWAYS wanted to be held. Rocked to sleep every night. When they are tiny, helpless newborns, it's not as big of a deal-those are the fleeting moments that everyone should try to cherish and soak up as much as possible. But an 18 month old who insists on being rocked, and then almost always wakes up when put down...not so much fun. Dave has been bearing basically ALL of the nighttime routine, since my belly is getting pretty large and Ryan squirms, climbs, flails around and kicks....not very comfy for me OR the little man.

She was also waking up 2,3, even 4 times a night. Again, poor Dave would handle it so the baby and I could rest and not have to deal with the stress. He is awesome, by the way. We refuse to co-sleep with her, since the dogs jump on the bed as they please, and we just don't want to have to break the habit later when there is a newborn in a cradle in our room...not to mention that is OUR space!! But on some nights, it would get so bad that we would find ourselves just giving up and wanting to LAY DOWN, so we would put her in the bed with us...she would typically snooze like a rock. Well, things were getting SO bad that we decided that Ryan just hated her crib. So we put a twin mattress on the floor and made it very cozy for her. The first 3 or 4 days were great. We would lay next to her until she fell asleep, which only took a few minutes. You could tell that she really enjoyed it. Then that started going south because she didn't want to settle down at night. She would waller around on Dave for upwards of 2 hours some nights. Eventually we just gave up and went back to rocking her again.

We were basically at our wits end. We have tried basically everything...from rocking to crying it out, I even made her go without naps during the day thinking that she could just be getting TOO much sleep. So I found a book at a consignment sale and we read about some different methods to get her down at night. I told Dave to decide what he thought was best and just DO it, since I am so baby-brained right now I can't even think of basic words in conversations.

He decided that we needed to go back to crying it out, but also a more
calm routine before bed, as well as getting her to bed earlier. And I am happy to say that what he is doing has been working well so far (I don't want to jinx anything, because she always seems to do well at first, then it all takes a nose dive!)

Ryan and I take a shower together after dinner, then Dave begins the wind down. After she gets out of the shower, it is all calm, soft voices, low lights and lots of cuddle time. He brushes teeth with her and reads books for a while. Then they say goodnight to her room, just like in Goodnight Moon...goodnight chair, goodnight door, goodnight sheep... Then he turns on Nickel Creek (her favorite right now) and slow dances with her for one song. He lays her down in her crib, pats her back, leaves the music on very low, and quietly leaves. The first night, she cried of course, and he went in to see her after 5, 10, and 15 minutes but never picked her up. She eventually gave it up and laid down and went to sleep. The next night, he went in once to see her, but it seemed to just make it worse, and she was out soon after anyhow. Now he does not go back in and she is down within usually 15 minutes. She will lay there calmly and talk to her baby or blanket, or just listen to her music for a few minutes before dozing off.

Her temperament has been better during the day since we started this. She was at a point of exhaustion and frustration and would get pretty cranky, needy and demanding during the times when she SHOULD HAVE been napping peacefully. But she is doing well now. Good sleep is SO important for little ones. Of course, it's nice for the parents too, but in the end, we really just want what is best for Ryan.

We have been on this routine for over a month, and I am happy to say that Ryan has found her groove! She actually prefers to be put down awake now. If she falls asleep in the car or stroller, she almost always wakes up when moved and that is the end of her nap. She wiggles away when trying to rock her, so I don't even try anymore! I dance with her to one song and lay her down. She talks to herself about her day for a little while, but typically goes to sleep fairly quickly. She naps for 1-2 hours right now, and usually wakes up refreshed and in a good mood. At night, Dave reads her a few books, they listen to music, and she is down in the crib by herself. She typically sleeps 11 hours on the nose.

So...the moral of the story is...crying it out WORKS. It is actually what they NEED. It seems so cruel, and it took us 18 months to finally commit to do it, but it WORKS! And they are so much better for it! I was always afraid that not getting her when she cried would instill a sense of worthlessness, as if she was not "good enough" or valued enough to be consoled when upset, or as if her being upset was not validated. I wanted to show her that we were always there for her. And I had read that picking them up when they cry gives them a higher sense of self-worth and better self esteem. That is why it was so difficult for us to get to this point. In the end, we figured she knows we think pretty darn highly of her, and she was just getting to be the biggest fuss ALL the time because of the sleep troubles. Not to mention, we were FRIED as parents! All of the things we WERE doing were not working, so we decided to flip it on its head and do something totally different. So we went for it, and after 3 nights...trust me...the next one will be broken MUCH sooner ;)

Babyland General

We woke up one Saturday morning with no real family plans for the day. Rather than squander the entire day running errands or doing remedial chores, I suggested we take Ryan to Babyland. Babyland is the home of Cabbage Patch Kid dolls. You can adopt handmade babies there, there is a small museum area with some of the very first dolls on display, nurseries set up with cribs full of babies, and best if all-Mother Cabbage, where a nurse delivers a doll from the patch right there in front of you! She has been very attached to her baby dolls lately, and I knew she would just love it. It is about an hour and a half away, and near where my brother lives, so we met up with him for lunch. We ate at a little country place that was not much more than a roadside stand. Everything was either BBQ or heavily fried, but it was pretty darn tasty!

When we got to Babyland, we couldn't wait to let Ryan see all of the babies! She immediately wanted to hold a little baby boy doll out of one of the cribs and put him in her stroller. Daddy helped her clip him in and she pushed him around. Then she got a different baby boy doll (little brother practice!) and climbed up in a rocking chair to rock him. She sat there rocking this baby for at least 15 minutes. It was adorable.

Rocking a little baby boy

Clicking the baby in the stroller

Pushing a baby in her stroller

She did NOT want to get up and we had to basically force her to move on! But we were able to distract her since there was a play kitchen in the next room. She ran right up to it and proceeded to prepare a tea party for herself and another little girl who was there. Then we let her wander around the store area for a whole as mommy and daddy followed behind. She found lots of dolls to hold, and even a stuffed dog that she played with for a long time. Then she picked a baby and found a doll stroller an pushed it around FOREVER! She is so loving and motherly to her babies. She pushed around the stroller like it was her DUTY, then she found a doll car seat carrier and put the baby in it and carried her around the store for a very long time.

She found a little table and chairs and sat the baby and carrier in a chair and sat down herself in the next chair, just like a realm mommy would do at a restaurant. She even rocked the carrier occasionally. She got to see a doll being born in the cabbage patch, but it wasn't very interesting to her.

Watching a Cabbage Patch Kid being born!

We made it out somehow without spending a dime, even though I think Dave and I both desperately wanted to get her the doll she carried around the whole time. I can't wait to take back again soon!

Lots of stuffed animals all around!

On the Cabbage Couch with daddy!

IT'S A BOY!!!

Here we are at 19 weeks. I am almost at 21 and need a new picture!

We found out on February 2nd, Groundhog Day, that we are expecting a baby boy!! We were sent to the same place that did Ryan's "BIG" ultrasound, and once again, we were in the waiting room for over an hour. They made me fill out a cruel amount of paperwork...I'm talking 15 pages or more...and sit there for.ev.er.

Once we were finally called back, the sonographer took us into a little dark room, and things started very quickly. I hopped up on the table, peeled down the layers of maternity clothes to reveal my belly, and she jumped right in. She touched my belly with the wand for one split second and asked "do you want to know if it's a boy or girl before or after?" and we both said "BEFORE!!" and she said "it's a boy", very slyly. It was just THAT quick. We knew within 30 seconds of being in that room.

Dave and I both shrieked! He not-so-secretly really really wanted a boy, so he was grinning from ear to ear the rest of the day....he is VERY proud of himself. I, on the other hand, while perfectly happy with this gender, was in total shock. For weeks, people had been asking me what I wanted, or what I thought the baby was, and I always just kind of said "don't know, don't care, it is what it is already and there's no changing that, it's not my decision..." and so on. But apparently I was expecting another girl, because I STILL have not wrapped my head around the idea of a boy. In that one instant, with those 3 quiet words, my world was flipped upside down. I have always wanted boys, but now I'm getting one and what the heck am I supposed to DO with him? I can't even give my nephews a bath because I feel inappropriate! Well...I have no doubt I will learn very quickly...

The ultrasound went on for another 20 minutes or so. They look at the heart, the spine, the kidneys, and all of the important stuff to make sure he is healthy and everything is where it should be. Then they let us see his face. Our little man was NOT cooperating - he was VERY active and squirmy, and he had his hands up to his face the whole time. So we never got any GREAT face shots, but he is perfectly healthy and measuring a week ahead! In fact, the doctor didn't even come in to see us afterwards. They sent in a nurse practitioner who told us that the doctor looked at our scan, and everything is just dandy as far as an ultrasound can see, so he didn't even need to see us...a VERY good thing...think about it, if the specialist doctor needs to meet with you and discuss something after an ultrasound like this, something is not right. So we were all too happy to never meet him!

So we hopped in the truck to head home, making all of the family and friends calls along the way. It seems like almost everyone had their money on a boy, so we didn't really get to shatter any hopes or dreams haha.

We didn't announce it to the world until Sunday afternoon. I wanted to tell our church family first. So Sunday morning I walked into the sanctuary and presented our pastor with a big box that said "Baby Sullivan Girl or Boy?" really big on it. He danced around it for a little while, taking a poll of the church to see who was for a girl and who was for a boy. ONE measly person said girl! (Boo. I wanted more shock and surprise.) But he slowly opened the box, unaware of what would happen, and a little blue balloon floated out and the place erupted with smiles and applause.

We sort of have a name picked out, but Dave gets the final say this time, and he is dragging his feet! But I think that we both think it feels right, so I don't foresee it changing...but I can not release it until it is final!

The baby is doing really well. We had a check up a few days after the ultrasound at our regular doctor and we got to hear the heartbeat again. We tried EXTRA hard this time to get Ryan to not freak out when the doctor touched me. All she does is measure my belly and listen to the heartbeat, but you would think she is stabbing me repeatedly in front of my child, the way Ryan acts. I took a moment to hold Ryan and point out the nurse's pretty pink scrubs and asked Ryan to say PINK! Then when the doctor came in, she talked to her and asked her to help out with the exam. She got to hold the measuring tape, which was not a good enough trade off, and she started to tear up. But then, the doctor pulled out her very special "baby phone" so the baby could talk to us! She let Ryan hold the wand and put it on my belly to hear the heartbeat and we explained that that was her baby brother saying hello! After that, it was "more, more, MORE!" She loved it. The only real "news" we got was that the baby's placenta is on the front this time, whereas Ryan's was on the back of my uterus...is that too much information?? Hmm...well, anyhow...

I can feel him moving every now and then. Not kicking or anything, I can just feel those flutters and know he is awake. Dave felt him move just a little last night. I am at that point where I am aware that there is a solid entity down there, and its not just belly blubber. I have been feeling pretty good. My hip has stopped hurting for the time being. The weather has been decent, so Ryan and I go for walks, which has all but cured the hip pain. I just get tired towards the end of the day and need to sit and take a breather for a while. Eating is the only complaint I have right now...I LOVE to eat, but my stomach can't hold as much as I would like it to. I don't have a "full filter" right now, so I never really feel FULL...I just feel less hungry. I have to gauge how much I eat and stop at a certain point, or I will feel awful later on. This is really only a problem at dinner time, my last meal of the day, since I will be laying down to sleep in a few hours. I don't have any heartburn yet...but I think I COULD if I am not careful, so that is why I gauge my meals!

Dave and I have decided that we need to be much more intentional with our time. We had fallen into a bit of a rut, where I kept Ryan all day and when Dave came home at night, he would play with her while I cooked, we would eat together, then it was bath time, and very soon after was bedtime. We weren't DOING anything. Every day was the same, and weekends were often filled with not much DOING anything either, as we always ended up running errands, doing things for other people, or just random household chores. Then the routine would begin again with me cooking dinner and the night was over before we knew it. It's called going through the motions, and it is the LAST thing we should be doing when we have this precious little gift to enjoy, and one on his way.

So this past weekend, we started off small...we took Ryan to the park. She loves all animals, so we took some bread so she could feed the ducks and geese. One goose came right up to us and stood less than a foot from us the entire time. Ryan laughed and danced as she waved and said "hi!" to each bird. She was a little disappointed when they didn't talk back, but she was happy, nevertheless. Then we had a picnic lunch on the grass. Ryan sat so calmly eating her PB&J sandwich, just taking in the sunshine. And after lunch it was playtime! She is getting big enough to play on the playground, with daddy right behind helping her, of course. After some good playtime, it was time to head home. It just felt GOOD, getting out and intentionally doing something as a family together, but Ryan was beyond ready for her nap, and so was daddy. After naps, we played outside with the dogs, something that they so desperately miss in the winter months. And after that, it was the Daddy-Daughter Date Night.

GEESE!!!

Ryan and daddy about to brave the slide!

Playtime!

Daddy couldn't fit on the alligator with her, but mommy and 20 week baby did...

Chik-fil-a recently hosted their annual Daddy-Daughter Date Night, in honor of Valentines day coming up. We heard about it last year, but Ryan was still too little for a kids meal, so Dave was among the first in line to make a reservation for him and his little chicken this year. I was so very jealous as they headed out for their special night together. Dave said that it was amazing!! The Chik-fil-a Cow was there, they had a maitre d' in a tux there to greet you and show you to your table. The girls were all given a rose upon arrival, and they gave them balloons as well. They had a young man playing the violin, they got to order from menus and be waited on, and the table were candlelit. I almost cried as he was explaining to me all of the little details. What a great company to do something so amazing to bring families closer together!

On their way to their date!

We are just trying to work in any little thing we can do together as a family, even if it is just go for a walk. These moments are fleeting and these kids grow up in a heartbeat. I'd rather have a house that is falling apart than a family that is. Be more intentional with your time, people....we don't have much of it.

But with that said....

Most days I feel like I am standing at the Poopy Gates of Parenthood, about to be knee deep in it...

Ryan has discovered that she does not particularly like having her diaper changed, and she thinks it is hilarious to make me chase after her naked behind, having to use 2 hands and a foot to get her wrangled into her Huggies.

She takes all of my bracelets out of my vanity drawer and slides them up to her elbow while holding up the shirt I wore yesterday to her chin and looking in the mirror repeatedly saying "toot, toot, TOOT!" which means "I'm cute".

She likes to take her baby monitor apart and run the pieces over to me exclaiming "Smell! Smell!" which in her toddler Southern draw sounds like "meal". And WHY are we smelling the monitor anyhow?

She climbs the stove as I cook and reaches for the knobs as I swat her away constantly.

She doesn't want to eat with HER fork, she wants to eat with YOUR fork, and when she gets it, she bangs it on her plate so that food goes flying, much to the delight of the 2 salivating hound dogs underfoot.

She constantly pushes away from the table at mealtime, throws her feet up on the table, grins at Dave and says "no no"....because Dave absolutely can not stand it.

She chases my love, Grimm, around all day, swinging from his tail, to the point where he then gets into trouble for growling at her and has to have some porch time.

If I am sitting in a chair, she has to be ON TOP of me and my bulging baby belly, so downtime is nearly impossible to find.

I walk up on her at times to find her digging through the laundry basket with Dave's dirty boxers on her head, and one of his dirty socks in her mouth, and quite often I find her cruising the hall with one of my makeup brushes in her mouth.

She is all too proud of her ability to speak, and will repeat the same word 50 times in 1 minute...some words like "bench" and "basket" are less than favorable since she pronounces them as "the B word" and "bad a$$", respectively...I only hope and pray that there is never a lady sitting on that bench in the narthex at church as Ryan comes running up to talk about the furniture....

But she does sweet things too....

She asks all day long to see the baby, and when I lift my shirt for her, she gives him sweet kisses over and over.

She asks for Tonka every morning when I am getting her out of her crib and she has to get down and give him and big hug and kiss.

When it's cold outside, she will snuggle her head into your chest as you carry her.

She makes you think she is starving, begging and pleading for snacks, only to share them with her puppies once I finally cave in and give her something to eat.

She asks to pray before every meal and always says AMEN! in her little helium voice.

She looks for the moon in the sky no matter the time of day, and some nights she will sit at the back door and just stare at it saying Moon! Moon! Moooooooon!

She tells me I'm pretty, even though I only have one pair of pants and 2 or 3 shirts I ever wear.

She rocks her baby dolls to sleep.

If she sees any sport at all being played...the Super Bowl, a little league soccer game, even cricket...she says "GO DOEWS" (Go Dawgs!)

She loves to clean and begs for wipes so she can wipe the furniture.

She knows that the sound of the garage door and 2 barking dogs means daddy is home, and she stands waiting to greet him after a long day.

When she gives hugs, she actually pats you on the back.

She is amazing, and she drives me absolutely up the wall. And we get to do it all again with her little brother. :) I'll take it.

Again, with the dirty laundry....this kid, I swear....